"How do you feel about your scars?"

Something people tend to be interested in when they find out I'm a recovering self harmer is how I feel about my scars. The truth is, I'm very lucky in that I don't have many prominent scars. That said, I get sunburn very easily, and when I do get burned my scars become pretty obvious.

I'd be lying if I said I'm comfortable with my scars. By the time you're reading this I'm going to have started covering them up with tattoos. I'm getting a shattered pocket watch on my upper left arm to cover my worst scars and to symbolise leaving the past behind and living in the moment. There's no deadline. I don't have to have worked out everything yet, I don't need to be well on my way to making my fortunes when I'm 21. I don't need to live by the clock.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not covering my scars out of shame. I just don't want to wake every day and see them in the mirror. I'd rather look at something I want to see than have a reminder of what I've come from every single day. I think the pocket watch is a good way to leave the past behind and start a future where I'm not constantly worrying about the fact that I don't have a "real job" yet, or worrying month-to-month about how I'm going to pay my overdraft bills. I will still worry, but it's a reminder that it's not the end of the world.

I think that's a reminder I'm going to need as I expand this site. I still haven't broken even in terms of income / expenses, I'm still putting in more than I get out, I'm still having to talk myself out of it every time I consider putting adverts on the site to get a little money that way. I'll get there, I will. It's just going to take time, and there's no time limit on it. It doesn't have to be done by a specific time on a specific date.